Do you remember the projects you had to do during the later years of elementary school? Were they hard or easy to do? Was there anyone helping you or did you complete them by yourself? One of the projects I remember vividly was that we had to draw the map of the geographical area we were studying. Whether with mountains and rivers or just the names of the cities this was an almost weekly project. What I also remember was that very often it was my mum who would draw the maps for me.
She was obviously trying to help me finish and go to bed on time as we had quite a lot to study. But it wasn’t only that. I also remember that what I loved to do after school and right after I’d finished lunch was to chat with my mum and aunt. So, by the time I’d start studying, it was already late. To top that, I’d start with the easy topics first and leave the difficult ones for last. Needless to say, I’d be way too tired and sleepy by then. And that’s when my mum would come in.
Since these days I’ve often wondered what would have happened had she not come to my rescue. What would have happened if she’d just let me do as much of my homework as I could. Even better if she could have faced her feelings and coped with my not finishing my homework. Afterall it was me who was going to school the next day not her. This would have been the real help. This would have definitely challenged me and would have probably pushed me to take my responsibility early on.
There’s no parent that I know of who wants to see their child fail. We all want to see our children progress in school and in life. How are we going to do that? By letting them try – or not try – and fail; by letting them face the consequences; by allowing them to take responsibility for their actions; and by being right next to them to offer our support when needed.